Counterpoint
by ruth baulding
Summary: Anakin. Obi Wan. Recklessly punctuated stream of consciousness, in honor of Valentine's Day.


**Counterpoint**

* * *

><p>Faster faster faster <em>faster <em>until there is no speed. No emotion, no passion. Only speed, only the Force rushing past rushing through rushing in, filling the void.

Flashing lights: other speeders other worlds- other stars other destinies. Red red red blue white green red yellow white white red. Faster. Reddish blue-yellow, greenish-white-red. Smears, blurred stars speeders worlds destinies. Faster. No color, no flashing. Only speed, only the Force.

Buildings. Eruptions of solidity, barriers spears walls forbidden passions. Left left right down right up down right right down up up up. There are no buildings, only the Force. Faster. Faster.

The speeder is trembling. Dying. There is no death, only speed. Beyond speed, beyond emotion, the machine blurs into self into smearing light into the Force. The machine is the rushing void. Fill it. Command it. Destroy command consume it. Faster faster faster than it was ever meant to go. There are no rules, no limits, no try.

Padme. Angel. Lover. Wife. Faster faster faster, no rules no limits no barriers no walls no white sterile virginal pure and holy Temple no _try._ Only Padme, only passion, only the Force.

Faster faster faster, get there sooner now forever. Her building, smear of light, spear of dark, solidity, grounding, anchor, home.

There. Here. Home. _Padme._

* * *

><p>In. Slowly, slower still, and yet slower, until there is no motion. No emotion; no passion. Only the still silent fulcrum, only the Force – present, pervasive, superabundant, filling and overflowing the void.<p>

Out. Overflowing. Released: other thoughts, other feelings, other paths, other worlds, other destinies. Slower. Rest, the pause between. No self, no thought, no emotion, no passion. Radiant, scintillating Light: all colors, all sounds, all forms and movement. All and everywhere: the Force.

In. This place. Foundation of solidity, tradition haven fortress sanctuary _Temple_. Here, within this circle, another center and another, sphere upon sphere, balanced in harmony. There is no here, no place. Only the Force. Out.

Each breath is a trembling death, dying into the Light. There is no death, only the Force. Beyond death, beyond emotion, self blurs into smearing light into the Force. The body is a veil over the luminous; the spirit a Light set to burn therein. Hear it; trust it; obey it. Be destroyed, commanded, consumed in it. Slower, deeper, more deeply than spirit has yet trembled. Breathe.

The Force. Strength, wisdom, beginning, end, purpose, cause. Deeper. No words, no oaths, no memory, no ambition, no _try. _Only the Light: compassion knowledge serenity peace, pure and holy _Temple _without walls, without place, without bounds.

In. Out. Rest between. Slower….deeper….the center. The Force. Grounding, anchor, home.

There. Here. Home. _Peace._

* * *

><p><em>She.<em>

The Senate building earlier: brush of silken gown, rustle of cloth, soft fall of footstep. Sweet scent coiling dark like her hair, coiling beneath breath beneath skin beneath pounding heartbeat. Not here, never here.

"Senator."

"Master Jedi."

Branding searing promise of things to come, of night, of another here. Her hair, now, dark coiling, uncoiling, unwinding, surrendering. Her scent, now: silpa spice, incense of the Angel, promise of things now, of here, of home. _Padme._

Broken promise, broken vow, broken trust. Healed heart. Her touch, healing. Her mouth, soft gentle burning promise of things now. Angel. Lover. Wife. Padme.

Captive, broken, surrendered, enthralled, enslaved. Silpa spice, uncoiling dark softness, broken oath, Light and Temple: Padme.

Her home. Her bed. Her arms.

_She and only she._

* * *

><p><em>She.<em>

The Senate building earlier: chime of jewelry, hush of brocade gown, arch of haughty brow. Sweet scent piercing fair, golden glory rising sun crown of sharp terrible beauty, piercing breath piercing belly piercing unruly heart. Not here, not anywhere. Never.

"Duchess."

"Master Jedi."

Branding searing reminder of things past, of the forgotten, of another place. In memory: her hair, cascading down, lightfall aurora splendor unbound, untrammeled, yielding, pouring between trembling hands. Her scent, then: haffa blossoms, sweat, dust, incense of the unspoken, the forbidden, the impossible. Then, far away, another world, another life: not now. Not ever.

Unsullied promise, unsurrendered vow, unstained honor. Broken, shattered heart. The Force: healing, soothing. Her wrath: harsh teacher of truth, reminder of duty, flail of memory, scar of regret. Duchess. Tyrant. Siren. Beloved.

Haffa blossoms, dust, incensed breath, glory of shining gold: renounced, forgotten, buried, released. A Jedi shall not know love. Not now, not ever.

The Temple, the Light, the Force. There is only the Force.

Not _she._

* * *

><p>This ancient dance. Here, sacred ceremony, wild joyful abandon. No self, only the other. Self and other entwined, poured out, extinguished. There is passion; there is the Force. I and thou, here and nowhere, now and always.<p>

Bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh. _Padme._

Sanctuary, deep within. Outside dust storm brewing rising roaring on the horizon…abandon destruction joyful extinction bliss nirvana. Closer, closer, closer…

_Angel. Savior. Lover. Wife._

The center, the storm, starbright supernova victory no self no other no pain no loss no fear. Emptied, poured out, spilled over into her, into peace, into the Force.

Consummated.

* * *

><p>This ancient dance. Here: sacred ceremony, perfect joyful discipline. No self, no other. . The crystal is the heart of the blade; the Force is the blade of the heart. Heart and blade entwined, united, alight in the Force, inextinuishable. There is no passion; there is serenity. There is honor, there is submission, there is obedience. Heart and blade, body and soul, here and nowhere, now and always.<p>

_I give my life to the service of the Force, unto my death and even beyond._

Sanctuary, deep within. Outside, blue lightning storm rejoicing singing howling burning on the horizon, the sphere of motion, this ancient dance. Inside, the eye of the storm the silent perfect fulcrum: Soresu calm Soresu power Soresu stillness. Service submission empty joyful extinction bliss nirvana. Deeper, deeper, deeper…

Balance. Truth. Light. The Force.

The center, the single blinding enlightening wounding healing unity. No self no other no loss no pain no fear no regret no longing. Emptied, filled; spilled out, nourished; humbled, exalted, obedient, free.

Consummated.

* * *

><p>Sleep beckoning. Here, amid softness, an angel descended, limbs uncoiled, hair unbound, heart unfurled. Worship, and then sleep.<p>

Here, with her, there are no dreams. There are no nightmares, for this is the dream attained. Peace.

Breath, self and other, rise and fall. Fullness. Contentment. Satiety.

_Padme._

Her hand, stroking gently. Commanding.

_My love._

Sleep.

* * *

><p>Sleep beckoning. Here, in simplicity, beneath a sliver of moonlight, a Jedi descended, limbs weary, mind untroubled, heart unburdened. Breathe, and then sleep.<p>

Here, without her, there will be dreams. There will be echoes of past longing. But dreams pass in time. That time has passed; and so too, will the dreams. Peace.

Breathe: Out.. No self no other no passion no emotion no need no yearning..In. Fullness. Contentment. Satiety.

The Force.

Its whisper, gentle, commanding.

_Yes, master._

Sleep.


End file.
